I'll give you two guesses where Mr Eko's finger is RIGHT NOW.

When all is said and done, JJ Abrams will primarily be remembered for two things: Felicity’s hair and getting the party started on LOST.

As you must know (unless you’re some sort of dorito-eating, spongebob lovin shut-in) the greatest mind-screw known to nerd is in it’s sixth and final season. Week after week we tune in to find out what’s going to happen to the survivors of Oceanic flight 815.  And inevitably we end up liveblogging the words “WHAT?” over and over again.

As we enter the home stretch, it’s time to prepare for the end.  LOST can only end two ways- as the worst ending of all time, or OHMYGOGMYBRAINJUSTSHARTED.

No in-betweens here.

So I thought I would pop in with a list of 5 things I’d love to see in the finale.

1. Mr Eko and the rest of the dead rise under the command of Death-Locke and break out into the Thriller dance.
2. The whole thing turns out to be the biggest, most complex con of all time.  Sawyer and Juliet (who faked her death) leave everyone stranded on the island with no money, no pants and no clue what the hell just happened.
3. Kate gives birth to Satan.  (And let’s be honest- you would totally buy this as a real ending at this point)
4. The polar bear mauls Jack to death and chews on his intestines.  Afterwards the Others, the LOSTies and anyone else who is on that damn island (seriously, how many gorram people are on that thing anyway? isn’t it supposed to be a deserted island??) get together and have smores by a bonfire, telling stories about how much they hated Jack.
5. The actor who plays Hurley snaps and eats everyone in a coke-fueled cannibalistic rage that ends on a Hawaiian waterfall with Tommy Lee Jones and a shot gun.  We’re all left saddened by the real-life tragedy but forced to admit that this may have been the most hardcore way to end a show EVER.

For the record, I’m fat myself, so that last one wasn’t me taking shots at Hurley’s weight so much as just rambling about what happens when celebrities get high on blow and fight Tommy Lee Jones.  Just sayin’.

For more news and thoughts, be sure to check out my site Rebelcomix.com

Also for today’s special, I present a list of 5 Things I Want to See From James Robinson’s JLA